The mental health Web site PsychCentral notes that we all have bad habits. But when the person with the bad habit is your therapist, it has "the very real potential of interfering with the psychotherapy process."
Here, according to PsychCentral founder John M. Grohol, are the 12 most annoying habits patients complain about, and some additional thoughts from readers.
1. Showing up late for the appointment: Some therapists consistently show up late for their appointments with their clients — anywhere from five minutes to even two hours.
2. Eating in front of the client: Asking, "Do you mind if I finish my lunch while we get started?" is inappropriate. Reader MostlyHarmless commented:
My appointments were at 1:00 p.m., and my therapist used my time EVERY week as her lunch hour, even though my binge eating was a major issue.
3. Yawning during a session: Believe it or not, there are therapists who fall asleep during session. Reader Nancy noted:
I had a therapist who fell asleep during every session. It turns out she was actually taking too many pain pills after foot surgery, but I didn't know that. I would be sharing intimate details of what was bothering me and look up and she would be sawing logs. How rude! Needless to say I stopped seeing her.
4. Too Much Information: It's the client's therapy, not the therapist's. Reader Lynn commented:
I briefly saw a psychiatrist who told me her whole life story – repeatedly. Every comment I made triggered a long story about her life. I stopped going to therapy because it seemed like such a waste of time to spend most of the session listening to her talk about her own experiences.
5. Being impossible to reach by phone or e-mail. Waiting a week for a return phone call is unacceptable in virtually any profession, including psychotherapy.
6. Becoming distracted by a phone, cellphone or computer. Therapists should never accept any phone calls while in session (except for true emergencies), and they should turn away from any other distractions, such as a computer screen.
7. Expressing racial, sexual, musical, lifestyle and religious preferences. A therapist who spends time discussing favorite musicians is not likely helping the client.
8. Pets: Pets are generally not an appropriate part of psychotherapy. Reader Suzanne said:
I have a friend who goes to a therapist who eats during the season, has THREE dogs wandering around, is chronically late.
9. Hugging and physical contact. Some clients are disturbed by touching or hugging, and want no part of it. Reader Lily wrote:
I had one therapist who seemed overly concerned with whether I liked her or not. She would frequently ask me if I liked her, how I felt about her, and she would give me small gifts. I was uncomfortable with it all.
10. Inappropriate displays of wealth or dress. Too much jewelry or skin can be off-putting. Reader Freeda said her therapist was:
A lady dressed to the hilt with a load of large metal accessories like belts, earrings and bracelets–she clanked as she moved.
11. Clock watching. The therapist who hasn't learned how to tell the time without checking the clock every five minutes is going to be noticed by the client.
12. Excessive note-taking. Taking notes, if necessary, should be discreet. Constant note-taking is a distraction for most clients. Reader SharonM said:
