Saturday, March 12, 2016

A physical exam without touching the patient -

Step 1: Greet patient.

Step 2: While chatting, check all boxes in electronic medical record for a complete review of systems and physical exam. Copy and paste parts of previous chart note while looking at patient every once in a while. Smile if possible.

Step 3: Tell patient to do yoga.

Step 4: Bill insurance company for complete physical exam.

Welcome to big box assembly line medicine.

Ever wonder what happens when a doctor goes to the doctor? Same sh*t.

A physician friend recently told me: "My last trip to my PCP was shorter than the time it takes to brush my teeth! If I hear one more suggestion to drink chamomile tea and do yoga … I just don't need the 3-minute bullsh*t session."

The truth is health care can't happen in 3-minute increments. Assembly-line medicine doesn't work for patients or doctors. Here's why: doctors aren't factory workers and patients aren't widgets.

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